first world problems
i can’t believe it. i’m seriously sitting here dumbfounded because i’ve never been in this situation before. it’s so frustrating that i just want to shout or cry. i also feel completely ridiculous. here’s why.
so, i wrote about the guy who never called last time. i am alternating days where on some i am totally okay with it, and on others i am bugging. the. fuck. out. today is one of the latter.
i mean, i’m doing this to myself. i keep looking him up on the other dating websites i’m on and every single fucking time i conclude that we are completely fucking compatible and should be dating NOW. or at least getting to know each other. texting even? fuck…
our chemistry/personality/relationship needs quizzes all show the same outcomes. his descriptions and style are right up my alley. i just can’t fucking believe that i found someone so compatible but who DIDN’T FEEL THE SAME WAY.
i might sound like an ass, but THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED TO ME BEFORE. i am just unable to comprehend this situation. acceptance is NOT happening. i want to bang my head against a wall.
i try not to spend too much time dissecting my behavior. he was all into me, it seemed, and then… silence. what did i miss? was it something i said? did i have food in my teeth? what part of me isn’t good enough for you, mister? what turned you off? what changed your mind? why didn’t you give me a chance?