hey y’all. :: waves ::
sorry i haven’t written. i’ve been busy emulating super woman. i don’t mean to boast (but i’m going to do it anyway), but in the last week-ish, i graded 195 essay questions, 65 participation assignments (also essay), submitted abstracts to three conferences, and finished part 2 of a manuscript that is now about 50 pages (with an easy 10 more coming before it’s done), ran 12 miles, went grocery shopping, bulk cooked, and re-watched all episodes of the walking dead. on top of a 4 day trip to california, where i drank lots of wonderful champagne and IPA. i feel like a million bucks.
i haven’t been this successfully productive in a very long time, but i have been working hard to get life back in order. including losing the 20 (!) lbs i gained while taking lithium. i’ve been working on it since january 2. with few results.
lithium weight is now my arch nemesis.
to be fair, i was estimating a rate of success based on my experience 2 (short…sniff) years ago, when the south beach diet took 12 lbs off my frame in a month. it was magical. it was fantastical. it was the most rewarding experience EVER.
i did the same thing starting at the beginning of january, and the scale Did. Not. Budge. i considered the possibility that one night every week or two, going out to drink might have been the culprit. but not with the restricted diet i was on! there’s no way! i started incorporating exercise (which i did NOT, i repeat, did NOT have to do before). still nothing.
i refuse to accept the possibility that “aging” is a factor. it was two years ago for fuck’s sake.
then i had to get an emergency root canal and follow up surgery, and being high on percocet is not conducive to a healthy lifestyle. i got in some solid hours on far cry 3 though. (ah-may-zing!).
so, here i am. it’s mid-march. i’m none-the-lighter. i’m ready to pull my hair out.
when visiting my family in california, i felt like the fucking michelin man. my 50-year old mother kicked my ass on a 5 mile run. yeah, that awkward moment. over half of the pictures we took are banned from the public because i look like a fatty mcfatfat.
there’s nothing to do but try again. with vengeance. and if this shit doesn’t start coming off quick status i am going to blow a gasket at my next pdoc appointment. i am going to send the dab who coerced me to take it hate mail.
the worst part of all of this is… i can’t even console myself with cookies and milk.